EVIE’S ARRIVAL
🌷On November 23, 2024, at 11:20 PM, we welcomed our sweet baby girl, Evelyn Eleanor Day, into this world. The day was spent by Kimmy and Ben’s side, my parents in the hospital waiting room. All of us, ready for the arrival of our miracle baby, and hoping and praying for a safe delivery for both Evie and Kimmy.
Evie arrived, strong, fierce, a full head of hair, and lungs and eyes wide open! All 8 pounds, 10 ounces, and 19.5 inches of her changing our worlds forever.
As I write this, less than 1 week after her arrive, Evie chilling and hiccupping in her bouncer, Darla at my feet, our home has never felt so full. How do I encapsulate what it feels like to have our daughter by our side? Something we have fought like hell to get. All of the cliches are true. We immediately fell in love with her. Our priorities instantly changed. We can’t imagine not having her in our lives. We have this sense of purpose, unmatched by anything we have ever done or ever could have imagined.
We have also been sleep deprived, (alleviated a great deal by the support of my parents and brother,) nervous (Evie lost 9 ounces in less than 3 days), uncertain (Darla is unsure if this wiggly creature is here to stay, a toy, or her new best friend - we’re hoping for the latter,) cautious (bring on all the hand sanitizer). Ultimately, next to the intense feelings of love and happiness, I feel the most immense sense of gratitude for our little one. I am so thankful to have her, but also, I can’t believe we did it! Phil and I came so, so close, to never meeting our baby.
It took all the science, two rounds of IVF, a selfless soul, Ghandi-level patience, the undying support of family and friends, and a lot of serendipitous luck, for us to have sweet Evie in our arms. Take away one item, and E-squared does not exist. I cannot fathom it.
I anticipate life is going to get chaotic and crazy and messy, but I will never, never take for granted how lucky we are to have our child. Celebrating Thanksgiving this past week, I was constantly reminded of how two Thanksgivings ago, our infertility journey was well underway. My heart truly goes out to all those people who are desperately hoping and praying to celebrate the holidays with the arrival that we experienced this week. Those same people who may be struggling to find anything for which to be thankful. The holidays can be an incredibly difficult time during infertility; it often feels like there is nothing to celebrate. I have been there. Multiple times. It’s dark and sad, and all consuming. (If you are here, be kind to yourself. If you know someone who is, reach out to them.)
So where does this blog go? Our baby is here. We achieved the most important thing we will ever do in our lives - we have safely brought our baby girl into this world.
The answer is quite simple. For anyone that has experienced any form of infertility, you know infertility never leaves you. It stays with you forever. It is a trauma that you carry. A part of your story, and it teaches you so much.
Infertility has given me a perspective that the things that often seem so significant and so important at a time (a disagreement, a forgotten milestone, work stresses,) really are not as profound as I once thought. I have been forced to slow down, trust processes, believe in myself and my family, give myself (and other) grace, allow myself to feel all the feels, have faith that things will work out, and let go of control.
I hope to carry these lessons into my new role as a mom. And meanwhile, I might as well share them :)
As women, it is so important for us to talk about all the things. Not just the lovely, happy times, but the really messy, hard, honest things. The experiences that hurt and pain us, but also make us stronger.
So, this blog. Just as I didn’t know where this was going to go 9 months ago when I started, I’m not sure where this will go now. What I do know is that sharing honest experiences is cathartic for me and maybe, someone else will find some comfort in them as well.
Maybe this blog will turn into a diary of sort, documenting Evie’s blowouts (we’ve already had a few,) or learning how successfully introduce Darla to Evie. Or maybe it will simply be little Evie anecdotes.
Stay tuned. 🌷
